Thankful for LinkedIn, the only place where delusion scales faster than revenue.
Thankful for your ironic â7 things I learned about B2B salesâ posts â teehee, so clever.
Thankful for the cold pitches from AI assistants that canât spell my name.
Thankful to see the guy I worked with 18 years ago proudly announcing a new LinkedIn Learning certification.
Thankful for the selfies that have nothing to do with the post. Do you like mine?
Thankful for the AI slop from people who never wrote a single sentence before 2025. Yes, you.
Thankful that LinkedIn satire isnât satire, itâs reporting.
Thankful for the charlatans cosplaying operators. Yes, you again.
Thankful that none of you read past the first line unless it goes viral.
Thanks for your engagement. #hashtags #ihatethem
Iâm seriously considering posting recipes, dog updates and vacation pics. Because if there is one place more dreadful than Linkedin, itâs Meta. #10monthsFacebookSober